What I Know About: The Right Time To Have A Baby

I used to be sort of biased against the idea of women having babies later in life. I think you know pretty early in life whether you want babies or not, so if you do, you need to focus on it before you get too far into your career.  The idea of purposely putting yourself and child at risk for the long list of the complications that come with it seemed crazy to me. It was easy for me to sit on my pedestal since I had all the children that I wanted to have before my 30th birthday.

But then I saw the two blue lines. What the hell?!

Last year during my annual doctor’s appointment, I asked about my rather unpredictable periods. I was told that it was probably the beginning of perimenopause. I remember clearly my kind and funny doctor said the good news was after two C-sections and ovarian cysts I can probably stop worrying about birth control. The bad news, I can start worrying about hot flashes.

Lesson learned; you can get pregnant in perimenopause.

I was so afraid. I am quite a few years past 35, and one of the first things the ob explained was my risk for having a baby with developmental challenges. Then, I am so out of shape, my back hurts and I make noises when I get off the floor, and that was happening before I was pregnant. How was my body going to handle a pregnancy, more weight gain and a third C-section?

By some miracle, I craved fruit, and ice, only gained 30 pounds. I was able to stay active up to about 32 weeks and did not go on bed rest until the end of my 38th week.  With my other two pregnancies I gained 60 pounds and was on bed rest by week 35, and they were born early at 36 and 37 weeks.

I gave birth to a beautiful healthy little girl on her scheduled due date.  I recovered, lost 20 of the 30 pounds and got back in the gym on week 8. I’m not sure how long it will take to lose these last 10 pounds.

I am no longer convinced that there is any right time to have a baby. I was as frightened and nervous this time as I was when I saw those two lines at 21 years old. It doesn’t matter if you are 25 of 45, If you have money in the bank or you are praying for your next dollar it’s never the right time. But be encouraged, you can do it, it’s worth it.

One thought on “What I Know About: The Right Time To Have A Baby”

  1. So true. I had my first two months ago at 27. Me and my hubby have been married for 6 yrs but I wanted to wait until I hit 30 before having our first child. For whatever reason 30 was the magic number. I would be finish with, well establish career wise & etc…whatbI know is you can plan all you want but life determines your fate. After having my son, I kinda wish I would have done it earlier. I had a physically healthy pregnancy but I sent a lot of it worrying. Now that everything has & continues to work, I’ve faced my fears I feel prepared for anything.

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